Antiquing

Another beautiful day in New England had me and Nukeboy out and about. We decided to take a Sunday drive up to Greenville and check out the antique store up yonder way. It's in this old factory building next to a river coming out of, wouldn't you know it, Mill Pond.

It's disturbing seeing toys I played with at antique stores. They had a whole slew of Fischer Price peeps. These were one of my favorite things to play with. I loved Angry Boy. I would try to scrape his freckles off.

Then I found this.  It was labeled a "Hair Processor."

How five 200-watt light bulbs would make your hair gorgeous is beyond me.  It looks like a prop from Beetle Juice.

They actually had a grindstone. I have never seen a grindstone in person. I feel more complete as a human to have been able to behold such an item and then to share it with you.

I seriously contemplated this item.  It was labeled a "rug beater." I could find more intriguing ways to use this. Especially when Nukeboy crosses that line of annoyancy and sends me over the edge. I'm sure his kids would be the same way. Just thinking about the future...

...and then I saw this. Much more effective. All good households and housewives need maces.

I did, however, splurge on these two items.  The first was a pair of silver lamé fashion gloves.  Why not?  No idea what I'd use them for, but I fell into that "it's on sale" category and just had to have them.

The second item was this amethyst choker.  See, the gloves are good for something. I can be a hand fashion model and show pretty jewelry, like on HSN.

It's made of meshed metal and lined with stones. Fake, of course. On sale, a given. Plus, it looks like I have a cat collar on, which is an added bonus.  See how it accents my silver lamé fashion gloves.

You can't hit an antique store without seeing Coke products.

These freaked me out, not only because they were still filled with that not-so-carbonated-anymore nectar of the gods, but two of the bottles were anniversary items from old local supermarkets.

Nancy, are you recalling these? Any reason why you didn't buy a crap load of these to store in your basement when you worked there for the future hope of making a million dollars on 25-year-old bottles of Coke now?

You apparently had a second chance when the take-over happened...

With all that Coke swimming around our heads, we were in the market for something cold to drink. So we wrapped up our shopping excursion and headed toward another Coke product: the A&W Restaurant.

They will actually come out to your car and serve you, old school, but without the skates. Besides, someone would break their leg in that parking lot thanks to our lovely, icy winters and the havoc that salt wreaks on tar. A&W girls could get lost for days in those pot holes. That would be a tragedy. Though, it could make for a funny sitcom.  Each week an A&W girl would get lost in a different Rhode Island pot hole sending them to another time and place in our blessed history, or future, for that matter.

Moving on, we opted for wieners "all the way," chili cheese fries, and root beer floats. Soft serve vanilla ice cream has to be the reason why we are all on this planet. I have to find a soft serve machine to keep in my kitchen. Please check eBay for me, guys.

Oh, and Steven, I'm not really into Coke paraphernalia, so you better get your butt over to our apartment and pick up your beautiful parting-gifts, and thank you for playing.

Yankee Doodle Dandy,

–TYG